torsdag 29 maj 2014

Blood predator (2007)

A group of people on their way to a ski-resort are involved in a planecrash and end up stranded in a cabin, besieged by alien creatures hungry for human flesh. And that is about as positive as I can be about this snoozefest of a movie.

First of all Mr Filmmaker, if you are making a creaturefeature, please have some creatures in it. Oh, we do get creatures but it takes exactly one hour and seven minutes of wading through a lot of pointless bickering of some of the most cliched and annoying characters ever put on celluloid. It's not even like you are hoping them to die horrible deaths, you are actually finding yourself devising scenarios where someone travels back in time and murder their ancestors so that they never existed in the first place. And when we do get creatures we are treated to "special" effects that make Bert I Gordons Empire of the ants look like an showcase for new technology. A mixture of wobbly puppets (that look sorts ok when they don't move) superimposed on the screen and really crappy cgi that looks like they didn't even bother to finish it properly.

No, this is not worthy of anyone's attention. The actors aren't totally worthless but the dialogue they are forced to spout is just fucking awful. There is a bit of gratitous nudity (including an odd scene where a lesbian character seduces a woman whose husband just got killed) and some minor gore but its far from enough. Skip it.

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